Life sucks!

Feeling: Sick and tired.
Listening: None.

I shouldn't be blogging? Sorry but I have to because I felt so sucky today. I hate everything around me now. Today we have teacher's day celebration, nothing much to mention about the uneventful event. SPY suggested that we shall go out and catch a movie after school and I agreed. SPY was asking Xiao Gang to go too and HT wasn't very happy about it. After I think HT said something that make SPY unhappy. When we're at the school's gallery, SPY was giving those black face with that kind of only-she-know attitude. I thought something is wrong with her or what, so out of concern, HT and I asked her but she didn't say anything. Should you be keeping things from us? I don't know. After HT called her boyfriend to go too. Holy shit!

Blah...That's nothing much about the things that I wanted to say. I feel so fuck up and pissed off. I feel that SPY, you're much happier with your boyfriend. Yea, I know he treats you very good and you wanna treasure him, fine, ok ahead, I don't care but why I feel you're much happier with him? Are we giving you too much pressure or you feel that we these fucking friends care too much about you? Seems like you only tell him about your stuffs. And we these friends know none about it. Fine if you doesn't want to tell us. Fine. I couldn't care much about it. I won't tell you any fucking stuffs about me.

I'm so sad to say that I never ever feel like going out with you guys again. NEVER!

Why everything you suggest to go out and I choose not to go? Because I don't want to see you two have fun with your boyfriend and leave me like that that's why I will always give you all excuses about not going. I'm not jealous that you guys have your boyfriend and for godsake, HT, I don't need anybody to introduce guys to me, it's not as if I have nobody to like and I'M NOT DESPERATE FOR GUYS!! I don't want any of them right now. If I want, I guess I already have it. Ok, I'm not boasting about. it's a fact!

Everything is so different now, I don't give a fucking care about you 2 have boyfriend or what but I just feel it's so different from last time when we 3 go out together. I'm not asking for too much. I just hope if we,3, can just go out without your fucking boyfriend? Maybe forget about it, I never want to go out with you people anymore. All I can do is to pretend nothing has happen.

I know you guys are really really nice friends of mine but I just can't help it but to say all these. This is just how I feel. Don't need to feel guilty about it or what. You all have do whatever you have. Good luck for your exams.

Another thing make me sad. My sis is a great person, she always spoilt me by buying the things I like. I really appreciate that little things s done for me. I'm so fortunate to have a sis like you. But I just can't understand how you can just waste your time away like that? I'm so sad to see you play that fucking game everyday! Can you do something more meaningful for your life? I don't expect you to do something great but I really don't see you putting in effort in finding a job. WHY? I'm so tired today, I take a nap and when I wake up, you're playing that fucking game again. Why? Even if you're not worry about your future but I tell you, I am. I am very worry for you. I'm very worry.

My Dad, can you please don't always be so mean to my Mum? Yea, sometime she some dumb things but you don't need to say such things to her. You're so mean. I wanted to scold you but I know I can't. Can't you just treat her nicer? I hate you so much something. Someday, I might just blast at you. I don't know why and I'm not waiting for it.

Why people I love keep doing such things that make me feel so sick and tired? I'm utterly disappointed with all these people. Do you know it may seem that such things is so minor but I'm crying when I'm typing this shitty blog. I'm so upset. I don't know who should I speak you. Sometime I really hate you people but I hate you because I love you. I'm sad. So sad................

I really just want to concentrate on my studies. As for Thurs & Fri prelims, I hope I can do well for my humanities.

Thanks: Niece, Luthien, Kimmy